Believe While Others Are Doubting
Posted on 22. Apr, 2010 by Laura-Jane - Whimfield in Inspirations, Life Dream, Personal
I am reading this book right now. In the book I came across the following, which was first written by William Arthur Ward:
Believe while others are doubting.
Plan while others are playing.
Study while others are sleeping.
Decide while others are delaying.
Prepare while others are daydreaming.
Begin while others are procrastinating.
Work while others are wishing.
Save while others are wasting.
Listen while others are talking.
Smile while others are frowning.
Commend while others are criticizing.
Persist while others are quitting.
To me, this is Cameron’s motto. The above is, like, Cam in poem form.
In an interview by CBF, the author wrote this about us:
“Cameron Lerch is a lucky guy, and his life is chronicled in hundreds of photographs, anecdotes and poems; indeed most of his thoughtfulness gets recorded online.”
Cam, do you feel lucky that I write these things about you? I feel lucky to be with you, especially these days. And I know you feel lucky to be with me, too! I have heard that the magic elixir for love and happiness in a relationship is to want to make the other person happy 100% of the time. And at the exact same time the other person in the relationship wants to make you happy 100% of the time. See how that works? If perfectly balanced, that would be perfect.
Well, I certainly cannot say that either of us do that 100% of the time. That would be a bit much, don’t you think? But lately I do like to think we’ve been trying to listen and be kinder and nicer and more thoughtful. It feels good to be nicer and kinder and more thoughtful.
I used to think that a perfect relationship is when you are 100% comfortable and could blurt out snappy comments when you’re in a bad mood and just let it all hang out, sweatpants and all. But I have come to realize–and learn, the hard way–that perhaps that’s not the ideal romantic relationship. Perhaps the ideal is a little more like work. Well, not work. But effort. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
My point is, I like Cameron. I like what he is, how he looks, and how he thinks. I am at a point now, after almost 12 years together(!) where we’ve almost come full circle. I feel differently about our relationship. I’ve stopped doubting and started really loving.
From the same book, “There are two things to aim at in life; first, to get what you want; and, after that, to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second.”
Cameron
Apr 22nd, 2010
First comment!!!!!!!!!@!
Michelle
Apr 22nd, 2010
There is something I’ve learned and the hardest lesson so far….( not the last difficult one, by any means) and it is this… learning to practice the fine art of “shut up”. It mostly applies to my relationship with hubs but is spilling over into other areas where I open my mouth to speak and then quickly close it.
There are rewards and less battles.
Gary Gray
Apr 23rd, 2010
Hi LJ
Great post! Relationships can be like a painting. If no one paints then the canvas remains in a blank state without color, warmth and feeling. Now love is an element that adds an entirely new perspective.
Love – Love is long-suffering and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury. It does not rejoice over unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.
1 Cor 13: 4-8
Be sure to paint a little every day…
Smiles :o)
Gary
John Quimby
Apr 24th, 2010
Any job worth doing is worth messing up. Words
to that effect were delivered by Joel Salatin at a seminar I went to on sustainable farming in December.
We accomplish nothing by dithering, only by doing.
As contrary as this is to my own procrastinating nature…it is an eternal truth that I achieve nothing by avoiding an attempt.
Thanks Laura Jane for zeroing in on this and sharing it at the moment when I MUST be doing!
Johanna
Apr 26th, 2010
Thank you. I feel the much the same in my own relationship.
I have always felt that dreams were just goals with no plan. Once I put a plan to it a Dream becomes a Goal. I dream of moving to PEI. I have a plan in place to attain that dream and if all goes well we could be moving there summer of 2012.
warren
Apr 27th, 2010
Of course, I have no hair atop my head. When she was younger, my wife always said that when she looked at a bald guy, she pitied his wife because she surely didn’t know what she was getting into. I suppose that is true. Sometimes what you get into is junk, but sometimes what you thought was gonna be junk turns out to be pretty cool. I *think* my wife would say that she definitely did not know what she was getting into but that her bald headed husband is pretty ok. After being together for so long, we have hit a groove as well and it just feels right…not perfect, but right. Not sure what my point is other than I hope you find “right”, even if not “perfect”.
Ken
Apr 27th, 2010
Four years of procrastinating about moving to PEI is near an end. The house is sold, the utility trailer is packed and waiting, the dream is waiting.
Three days now I’ve been staring at that full trailer.
I could leave in 5 minutes if I wanted to.
Bawk bawk.
Laura-Jane - Whimfield
Apr 27th, 2010
“All dreams are outside our comfort zone. Leaving that zone is a price we must pay to achieve them.”
Ken
Apr 27th, 2010
I was fishing for some wisdom …..
Thanks.
Laura-Jane - Whimfield
Apr 28th, 2010
Ken,
I can think of many who are working towards the dream of moving to PEI, and you are literally on the precipice of actually doing it. Well done. Lots of hard work and decision-making preceded this moment, I’m sure.
Let us follow your journey. Lots of people who drop by every now and then to this blog would love to know where you’re at. (And me too, of course.)
10% of people are pioneers
70% are settlers
20% are antagonists
Most people think pioneers are crazy.
Savour this moment. Then, jump.
Talk soon,
Laura-Jane
Johanna
Apr 28th, 2010
Ken
How I wish dearly I was at that point. I have been 6 years planning and still 2 years away from reality. Had a few bumps in the road that put things on hold. We are on track now I hope (fingers crossed)
As Laura-Jane said please tell us about it.
Hugs
Johanna
Ken
Apr 28th, 2010
Thanks for the support Laura-Jane and Johanna. It’s funny how the soul searching really intensifies once it’s actually possible to get in the car and go at any moment. It’s a good thing though, it brings my priorities in to focus and fosters courage. I’ll be leaving from Vancouver, I was born and raised here so it’ll be a bitter sweet good bye.
Kim
Apr 29th, 2010
Lovely post, Laura-Jane. It’s always good to stand back and look at a relationship in a new light, to create and welcome change, rather than fearing it.
More love & understanding is good.
Though mostly I’d rather just let Martin make chocolate runs, ply me with hot water bottles, and spoil me rotten, lol.
Vicki Lerch
May 3rd, 2010
Great post as always!! Happy Birthday today, Cam!!
brenna
May 5th, 2010
yes, happy bday to my bro!
Toni
May 6th, 2010
Happy Birthday Cam!! :)
Ken
May 7th, 2010
FYI….I’ve made it to Dryden Ontario so far….fighting my doubts and I keep pointing the car east :)
Johanna
May 7th, 2010
Yay Ken!!!
(wild cheering from the sidelines)
Think of me as you go past Morrisburg ON, we live 20 min north of there.
We will be going to visit the Island this summer. 12 days of being gypsies to the wind.
Good luck and please continue to keep us posted :)
Johanna
May 7th, 2010
Just realized you will probably be going through Ottawa. We are 30 min south of there. We lived in Ottawa for 8 years. Beautiful city.
Laura-Jane - Whimfield
May 7th, 2010
Yahooooooooooo Ken!!! We want reports from every province that you pass through!
Ken
May 8th, 2010
Thanks for the boost…..:)
I’m just east of Thunder Bay,,,,,,I want to take Hwy 17 to Ottawa for the scenery but don’t think my car can take any more pounding from this highway……is route 11 smoother ? I hear it’s scenic too….just in a different way (Moose,,Mice…Meece..Mooses)….maybe in better shape as well ?
Ken
May 9th, 2010
Well…I took Highway 11 through Ontario and don’t regret it……apart from some rough highway between Hearst and Cochrane…it was beautiful and very remote. Very friendly people. I left my wallet in a restaurant in Kapuskasing and my trailer got a flat tire in Cochrane (in town) I was very lucky on both…my wallet was still there when I went back for it and the flat didn’t happen two hours from a valve stem. It was cold…-5 and blowing snow, but invigorating and magical. Today I drove from Cochrane to Quebec City..(I’m very burnt out) nice people here in Quebec but crazzzzy drivers..
I have to get to PEI tomorrow so I can take my dog to a vet….he’s limping badly…..otherwise I’d probably make the days a little shorter.
Thanks Laura-Jane, for letting me post here
Laura-Jane - Whimfield
May 10th, 2010
Ken, can you believe you’re already almost here?!!!!! Safe travels. Enjoy. Pause before you cross the bridge! Think of how far you’ve come!
Ken
May 10th, 2010
Wooohoo….finally here….
Yes…I stopped at the view point and took some pictures of my dog and the bridge,etc. Kind of surreal, roughly five years of thinking about this moment, not sure it’s sunk in yet that I’m actually here.
Hey, not sure I would have done it without your blog, maybe I would have, who knows, but you two helped inspire me to take a chance and do this, so thanks…..and good luck with that not so little project you’re working on.
Johanna
May 10th, 2010
So very happy for you Ken.
Glad you made it. lots of cheering from here.
Laura-Jane - Whimfield
May 23rd, 2010
Ken! Where are you now? You have certainly arrived at a lovely time of year. The blossoms are coming out! Any news to report?
Ken
May 24th, 2010
Hi Laura-Jane
I’m staying out near Brackley Beach at a rental cabin, awesome people here that own the cabins..(C&G)..they’ve made me feel really welcome.
I’ve been house hunting mainly, and had narrowed it down to three properties. Hunter River, Cardigan, and Belle River. I liked the Hunter River property the best but didn’t feel comfortable spending the money they wanted considering I’m not working yet so decided on the Belle River cabin. Subjects should come off on Friday. It’s a nice spot right on the Confederation Trail, but I still have to investigate how much snow mobile traffic there is in the winter (a possible deal killer as I’m looking for a realy quiet spot). It really is picturesque here huh…more so than I imagined.
I’m happy to see your foundation is taking shape. I admire the ambition and energy that you two seem to have.
Thanks for enquiring about me, very thoughtful.
Ken
Laura-Jane - Whimfield
May 29th, 2010
Wow, you don’t mess around! :) Belle River is a good spot. Are the subjects off?
Has your pup recovered from the journey and his limp?
Ken
Sep 18th, 2010
ummmm…uhhh….gulp…too embarrased to say that after a month I turned around and drove back to Vancouver…..that was in May….I started regretting it as soon as I hit the Saskatchewan border. I bought a condo and have been living in it for a few months. I think about PEI all the time and what could have been. I miss the pace of Charlottetown and the serenity of a drive on an isolated road…and the people. I have listed my condo Laura-Jane…I think I have an offer and the home I was going to buy on PEI is still listed for sale…dare I ?
Dog is good.
Johanna
Sep 20th, 2010
LOL Ken.
It is a hard choice to make. Even though I have been working, scrimping and saving for many years in order to make the move myself I sometimes doubt my desire to move there. I live in ON so I can vacation in PEI, we have traveled there 5 times in the last 6 years. Do I want to move to PEI because the grass seems greener there or is it a genuine desire to move to a place that has a slower lifestyle. I flip flop on which one it is. My husband seems to think that I will always be a restless spirit and as soon as I get settled there I will want to be off on the next adventure. I really can’t answer him, I really don’t know. It frightens me to think that I would put my family through that kind of a move only to find that it’s not what I wanted. I have three kids to worry about and I don’t want to do something that may make their lives any harder.
So I guess I totally understand what you did and I wouldn’t be embarrassed, life is like that sometimes. If you do decide to make the trip back to PEI I would love to know how you make out, even if you don’t go back let us know how you are :)
Ken
Sep 22nd, 2010
Thanks Johanna
You know what, you’re so right on the restless spirit angle. Having kids quells that I guess, at least until they’re grown. I am single so can pick up and take off when I choose so am lucky in a way. I was born and raised here in Vancouver. I really don’t like it at all but always feel drawn back here, because it’s my birthplace I guess. I have decided to leave again though if my condo sells and drive the country in the winter this time, that’s if my family doesn’t have me committed first.
I hope when your kids leave home you get the chance to live on the island…at least for a while to fulfill your dream.
I’ll be sure to post here and let you know what’s going on…and thanks again for your nice comments.
Ken